We all know someone who is a survivor of sexual violence. We have seen social media filled with allegations against celebrities. We know of the friend of the friend who was abused by the basketball coach. We have a best friend who was molested by their stepfather. We might even be the survivor.
When we—collectively we, survivors and loved ones of survivors—get to witness accountability, we feel a glimmer of hope. Out of all those terrible things, we live vicariously through people who have encountered an ending that is the closest thing to justice they’ll know. Because real justice means that it would never have happened, but this justice means it happened, you survived, you believed yourself, and a jury of your perpetrator’s peers believed you.
What happens when those things happen and people still don’t believe you?
We can’t escape high profile cases. We are currently being exposed to graphic details of abuse every day we go on social media, turn on the tv, or read the news. Our brains can’t distinguish between direct trauma, indirect trauma, and perceived trauma. We are being traumatized, survivors are being retraumatized, and what are we doing about it?
The current situation of the Epstein files goes beyond politics. No matter where you fall on the American political spectrum (or even nowhere at all), the fact is that there has been suspected abuse, documented accounts of graphic sexual abuse, and a disproportionate number of prosecutions to the violence that has occurred.
Sadly, for sexual assault center staff, none of information released from the Epstein files surprises us. We have directly and indirectly encountered the absolute worst of what humans are capable of, and it is our responsibility as advocates to support and empower our clients. For some clients, that means encountering the criminal justice system. However, how can I, as an advocate, encourage my clients to seek justice when they see a world that not only does encourage accountability, but doesn’t even believe them? How do I support my clients that believing survivors, a core component of accountability, is somehow minimized in society?
A lack of being present says, “I don’t believe you.”
Closing your eyes says, “I don’t believe you.”
A lack of funding says, “I don’t believe you.”
I don’t know the specific solution to our problems. I feel that what I am supposed to say is to believe survivors and practice self-care as needed. What I really know is that silence is deafening and validation is perhaps one of the strongest values I’ve witnessed for survivors. With that knowledge, figure out what these redactions mean for you.
[Redacted] will support survivors by [redacted].
I will take care of myself by [redacted].
Accountability means [redacted] if we can’t [redacted].
